Question of the Month
Ask J - September, 2008
Question: J. Kyle, I am a 54 year old male CDL truck driver. During 4 academic years of school leading to my receiving a Master's Degree in Oriental Medicine & becoming a National Board Certified Acupuncturist, it seemed everything flowed smoothly, I was happy in learning, & graduated with a 3.4 overall G.P.A. No problems at all during 4 yrs. of school, no mechanical problems with my vehicle, no other budget drains, good grades, everything smooth as silk. Almost seemed too smooth.
After graduation, I was down to about $500 from student loan money & began trucking again for 2 years to save money for an acupuncture office practice. After saving $12,000, I moved back to Nashville, TN. & there's where my problems started happening.
I felt I would have to go solo in practice for there aren't many clinics, doctors, or chiros. around hiring acupuncturists, especially ones fresh from school. Although consciously I really wanted to start an office practice, I started seeing how difficult it was going to be with calling different places about office leases, terms, insurance, brochure/business card prices, design prices for the same, marketing, software, & other business aspects.
That's when I dropped the ball. I put everything on the back burner and did nothing the next year & more but eat, pay rent, watch T.V., & spent a lot of time on the computer researching more into alternative med. & Oriental medicine.
My funds dropped from $12,000 down to about $3000 & suddenly I realized, as if coming out of a fog or sleep, I needed at least $8000 to start the practice & why in the world had I sat around so long & let this happen? I haven't figured that out yet except maybe I was unconsciously procrastinating. I began even thinking maybe Satan or the dark side of the universe might not want me to become a healer. I remember reading in the King James bible where "the devil is the author of confusion". Again, it could have been just procrastination, but in earlier periods of my life I would never have sat around for a year & more & let funds dwindle down like that. That's when I began becoming suspicious that something more sinister might be at play, especially with my potential at becoming a good healer.
I went back into trucking to raise more start-up money and certain events, incidents, & accidents began happening that seemed to me to be a little like bordering on bad luck or influenced by an external force.
I honestly began to feel that something didn't want me to be sucessfull towards beginning an acupuncture practice. I was trying & working just as hard & dedicated in trucking as I had in Oriental medical school, yet negative things & events were occurring like "Murphy's Law", & I also hadn't had these problems crop up in trucking before I had attended acupuncture school, again arousing my suspicion that something evil was trying to influence me.
Then I thought, "Could it be God telling me he doesn't want me to be in trucking anymore & just do the acupuncture?"
I'm just a little confused at this point & was wondering if you might share some advice with me or give guidance to some information that might help me sort through this dilemma?
I love to read quotes from various people. Below is one I thought might apply to me. It seems contradicting & I was wondering if you might tell me what Mr. Williams actually means here.
"Success is blocked by concentrating on it and planning for it.…Success is shy — it won't come out while you're watching." – Tennessee Williams
again.... seems a little contradicting to me. Maybe there's a deeper meaning here I'm not seeing.
Another confusing thing from that quote-could I be planning or concentrating too hard on my ambitions?
I truly thank you for any advice or guidance to any materials.
Jason W. - Nashville, TN
Answer: Jason, this is normal. We are taught to set goals but not where the reward is truly. The reward is captured where the most resistance is and that is in trying to reach the goal. Once the goal is met, we need something else to look forward to. We are goal oriented organisms and yes it is a vicious cycle. Our bodies need food. When hungry, food is the goal. Once we eat, the desire dissipates until that time that we are again hungry. This cycle does not seem so daunting because food is readily available, but imagine if you had to go hunting for every meal while suffering days of hunger.
Here's another thing to think about. Most humans are afraid of the success they seek. They get really close to an accomplishment and then sabotage their efforts. I know it sounds weird but true.
I don't think that God is much concerned about your career path in terms of what you do. I would think that where you can do the most good for this world is where you need to be. In the end, they are both personal expressions of who you are. What do you want the world to see and how can you most help.
Use your truck driving to help build your acupuncture business. Don't shy away from it. Boldly step into the new world you wish to create.
As far as the quote. It simply means to stop kicking the tires of your dreams and simply get in the car and drive. Nothing is ever accomplished by just thinking and planning. You have to do something to get something done. You can use that one if you like.